Girls Gone WIld

I am really really trying to get a picture of the police woman in combat boots, really I am, if they would stop looking at me. The Seargent is very suspicious of me with that camera hanging off my face most of the time.
"Saaaage, may I please take a picture of Girls Gone Wild on the desk" hoping to shift the camera a bit and take in the edge of big momma's combat boots.
"What you do with that komra ever day? Ever day ever day I see you wid dat komra pinting it da we"
"I report the weather on the internet" I said to him trying to fathom what's going on behind those reflector sunglasses, I see the faint curl of a smile. I'm a bad liar, a nervous liar, my mouth goes dry, my heart is about to pop out of my chest. I could never pass a polygraph test, even if I was innocent.
"How you know bout Girls Gone Wild?" he asks gruffly
"I noticed Girls Gone Wild carved into the police desk when I was making out the report against Freaky White Granny's crackhead boyfriend when he threatened to burn the place down ecause of the eviction - but you were on leave"
"Oh, ok den"
He watches me, I snap snap snap. Combat boot momma crosses and uncrosses her big thick hairy legs.
"Why you want dat picture for the weather report?"
"Oooooohhhhhhhh" I say, stalling for brain time, "That one's for a story I'm writing about white girls who come here and hook up with the wrong kinda people and get themselves in trouble." My face is burning.
"Girls Gone Wild been on dat desk from ever since..." he said as I scuttled away.