Thursday, December 01, 2011

Wednesday, August 03, 2011

A Lovely Day

I woke up this morning with this song is going round and round in my head. Back and forth up and down doing my local shopping on Caye Caulker, from Miss Julia's to Deals on Wheels to Chan's Supermarket to Chinatown, oh I just noticed a new chicken place next to the bakery. Screech-HALT! Delicate balance, I'm riding my pink beach cruiser in a wrap skirt. I'm not worried about flashing anyone, the skirt is definitely long enough, plus its a girl's bike so I don't have to fling my leg over the bar. I am more concerned at not getting it wrapped around the chain and me spilling onto the sandy street legs up, my groceries hanging in sacks off each handlebar. Kick stand down, bags balanced so the bike doesn't tip over, I get on and off, but sometimes just straddling the bike and shouting "You got avocados?" "You got cilantro today?" "How much bananas for dolla?" I pass the tortilla shop and turn the corner Slowly maneuvering around the giant muddy water holes left from last night's rain I pass Chan's hardware on my way to BTL to pay the phone bill and LOVE FM is playing Don't Worry, Be Happy. I couldn't have said it better myself, as I put the kickstand down, tromp in and say "MORNING!"
"Morning Miss Lee Ann, I haven't seen you in a while"

Bill Withers - Lovely Day Lyrics

When I wake up in the morning love
And the sun light hurts my eyes
And something without warning love
Bears heavy on my mind.
Then I look at you and the world's alright with me
Just one look at you and I know it's gonna be
A lovely day
When the day that lies ahead of me
Seems impossible to face
And someone else instead of me
Always seems to know the way
Then I look at you and the world's alright with me
Just one look at you and I know it's gonna be
A lovely day
My taste in music roams around and around but right now I'm loving Pitbull and all of his collaborations with other artists. So enjoy my picks!

Or you could head over to Oceanside and kick off your flip flops and whynd wind wynd, and shake the fringe on your skirt. Ladies, you know you want to.

Monday, July 18, 2011

Photo Friday - Seashore

On Caye Caulker, kids are kids. You will see them playing marbles on the sandy streets, kicking balls, and if they don't have a ball, kicking a plastic bottle, riding bikes, playing like kids used to play before the internet and x-box.
To view more of my photos on Flickr click here.
To view more Photo Friday submissions, click here.

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Sugar Kisses

CLICK ON THE YOUTUBE VIDEO WHILE READING THIS POST to get the same feeling I had when writing it.

"No Sugga inna Caye Caulker bring fram de City"
the text message read on Tuesday morning, from Shirlene.
"No sugar on the Caye, need to get some before you drop me at the water taxi." I tell my taximan
HE: Well gud luk wid dat, sugga scayce right now."
ME: For tru? Chiney shop noh hav?
HE: It all inaa de newspapa, dey carry too much da Guatemala, sell it on de block markit, get 6 times de amount we pay inna Belize. Greedy sukkaz.
ME: Me noh pay tenshun da newspaypa
So I dash into Sav-U-by-de-roundabout, to the sugar aisle and it was empty. EMPTY. EMPTY EMPTY. Almost in a panic (sweating and hyperventillating) I asked the young boy stocking the shelves, about sugar... "Yu hav, yu noh hav?"
"We hav" he say, slowly backing away, "Sugga scarce, yu cyan hev only 5 pownd." and went to the back room to get it.
"All de mi giv me is 5 pownd" I tell my taxi man, "Mek you ker sum fa me" I hand my taxi man a $5

Midmorning clandestine sugar purchases. My taximan comes out of the store walking nonchalant, like the sugar is for HIM, giving a little skip. A conspiratorial smile on his face. Hmmmph! Always a way to beat the system.

The crux of the problem is that there is no production problem in Belize, the sugar prodcers say they have been selling enough to the local distrubutors, but these same distributors have been illegally exporting sugar to Guatemala, shorting the local economy, because they can get up to 6x the amount than what we pay here with our government price controls on basic commodities.

So, with sugar so scarce, I have stopped vacuuming the ants out of it.

"What are these insects?" a tourist man said pointing to the sugar jar.
I pretend to peer at it, knowing full well what he's pointing at. "Oh, those are just sugar ants" not paying him any mind "Totally edible."
I see his stomach turn. I actually physically see it, and think "stop being such a cry baby man".
"Well if you don't like them, which by the way I do, extra protein and all, just wait till they float to the top of your coffee and then skim them off."
"Here, let me show you." and I drop a teaspoon of sugar into my coffee, the ant floats up, I skim him off in one swoop. "Because I am not freakin throwing this sugar away, sugar scarce you know."

To read more of this blog, click here.

Friday, May 13, 2011

Thursday, May 05, 2011

A Slight Case of Volcano Mouth

Be careful, its contagious.

Now that Easter is finished, and nearly all the tourists have left. I find myself with... time on my hands, and frankly, I'm bored. Now LiLi or Liliana (my new name given to me by The Mexicans cuz they can't handle Lee Ann), you could use your time wisely, so you say. Wisely, like paint a silk scarf, or produce something interesting and beautiful? Oh, not me. I'm using my time to taunt the few young men left on the island. Why the young men you ask? BECAUSE THEY ALWAYS TAKE THE BAIT.

Two young (shirtless) guys sit down at the coffee bar and I serve them their steaming hot cups of java.
As I set them down on the counter top, I mumble "I hope you like strong coffee."
They look up at me surprised and one of them answers, "Yes Maam we do."
Oh, there's that word "Maam", again. In young boyspeak it means, o.k. you old windbag.
"You're not going to winp out on me are you?" I say
"Pardon me?" he replies
"You're not going to winp out on me and ask for hot water to add are you?" I say menacingly
"Oh no maam, I can handle it."
"You sure?" I just can't let it go.
"Yes maam."
"Ok then."
No more to tease about and I back away slowly, THEY HAVE SUCCOMBED TO MY DOMINATION.
Two older ladies come in and buy a brownie, and come back a few minutes later and buy another one. The younger of the two exclaims "I have never had a piece of chocolate in my mouth that tasted so good. What secret ingredient are you using?"
I ignore the obvious and tell her "Hashish."
"Really?" she exclaims
"JUST KIDDING, do you think you can buy a hash brownie for $2 U.S?" I answer, "Its the espresso and cinnamon."
"Because I ate a ganga brownie in Jamaica." she confides
Her friend quickly adds, "Well I didn't eat the brownie! I passed on that!"
"And I was stoned the next day." the younger of the older ladies adds
"Well this one will just give you a sugar high." I reply
"Jesus loves you and he's coming back to earth one day." she says while retreating out the door.
Today I was asked if the coffee ice cubes in the iced coffee were made from coffee, and I answered "No, its well water"
I will never tire of seeing open mouth dismay from my customers...
"JUST KIDDING" I say, "its coffee."
I should slap myself sometimes
A young man orders a ham & cheese omelet with bagel and fruit cup today and when serving him the plate, I had forgotten the fruit cup on the counter top. Remember, I should be wearing a T-Shirt with WWW on it (World's Worst Waitress) and to recover from my little error, I told the customer that we were out of fruit and asked him if it is o.k. if I give him this cup of napkins instead?
So polite, these young men are, he just said "errr..... I guess... that's o.k." polite and uncertain.
JUST KIDDING! And I limped back to the kitchen to get it for him, only I forgot which leg I was supposed to limp on, and after a few steps Shirlene comments from the kitchen, "Wrong leg Miss Lee, de adda wan."
What would I do without Shirlene?

Sunday, May 01, 2011

Photo Friday - Primary Color - Blue

Blue, Azul, Blauw, Turqoise, Bleu, Cyan, Sapphire, Lapis, the name changes, but the feeling is still the same.

Cool water, floating, sun hot pouring down, skin tight, relaxed, happiness, licking my salty lime lips, eating pulpo ceviche tipping the bowl up to drink the juice.

Micheladas con Sol, salsa music, Cuban singers, dreadlock trombone player, brown skinned buff bodies, shake shake shake.

Cougars Gone Wild, the over 50 edition.

Shot last weekend in Cozumel Mexico, this was the only day we went where Mexican tourists go, Playa Azul Beach Club. The rest of the trip was spent back-a-bush and back-a-town riding motorcycles and eating fish tacos.

For more Photo Friday selections click here.

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Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Relationship Advice from my Mother

If you want someone who will eat whatever you put in front of him and never say it's not quite as good as his mother's

Then adopt a dog

If you want someone always willing to go out, at any hour, for as long and wherever you want ...

Then adopt a dog.

If you want someone who will never touch the remote, doesn't care about football, and can sit next to you as you watch romantic movies

..then adopt a dog.

If you want someone who is content to get on your bed just to warm your feet and whom you can push off if he snores

..then adopt a dog !

If you want someone who never criticizes what you do, doesn't care if you are pretty or ugly, fat or thin, young or old, who acts as if every word you say is especially worthy of listening to,

and loves you unconditionally, perpetually ..

..then adopt a dog.

BUT, on the other hand, if you want someone who will never come when you call,

ignores you totally when you come home, leaves hair all over the place,

walks all over you, runs around all night and only comes home to eat and sleep,

and acts as if your entire existence is solely to ensure his happiness ....

..then adopt a cat!

You thought I was gonna say... Marry a man, didn't you?

Send this to all the women you know to brighten their day. Send this to all the men just to annoy them!


...have a GREAT Day!!!

To read more posts in this blog click HERE

Tuesday, March 08, 2011

Photo Friday - Turbulance

Is it a shark, or is it a manatee? Well almost. A curious snorkeler swims past the sunset shoot of Tina and Henry on their wedding day. All you can see is head and butt bobbing in the water. Click here for more Photo Friday submissions.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

The Whys and the Wherefores

Where is Bigness and why aren't we hearing about him? The emails kept coming as I slowly wrote him out of the story. The old Creole saying, "Slowly, slowly you take your hand out of the tiger's mouth." His attitude went from, DENY DENY DENY, until he could deny no more, to I love you, I'm sorry I HAVE A PROBLEM to SO WHAT. When it reached SO WHAT I knew the relationship couldn't be saved. The divorce has been final since August. It was embarrassing and I was in no mood to talk about it, even to my parents. I finally called my Dad and told him what had gone down, and he said what I needed to hear, "We would never expect you to stay in a situation like that." Bigness has moved on and on and on and 2011 IS THE YEAR I GOT MY LIFE BACK.

Sade can say it so much better than I can.

Lyrics to Sade's Every Word

I saw a picture
How could you be so careless
How could you have done that to us
And I write this letter
I send it all back to you
And every word you said

In there every word, oh oh oh oh
How could you have done that to us

You treated me like a stranger
And all the time I was loving you
All your slick moves
They were once innocent moves
I wanted to look up to you
I really trusted you
And every word you said

In there every word, oh oh oh oh
How could you have done that to us

(Love is what the word was)

I was loving you like a child
All the time you were smiling
The same smile
I was loving you like a child
I really trusted you

Every word you said
Every word you said
(Love is what the word was)

Every word you said
Every word you said
(Love is what the word was)
(Love is what the word was)

Every word you said
Every word you said

I was loving you like a child
All the time you were smiling
The same smile
I was loving you like a child
I really trusted you

Every word you said
Every word you said
(Love is what the word was)
I send it back to you, yeah
(Love is what the word was)

Every word you said
Every word you said
(Love is what the word was)
I send it all back to you, yeah
(Love is what the word was)

Saturday, February 05, 2011

Photo Friday Self Portrait 2011 challenge

So shocked I was when I took these photos off the camera. The lighting was perfect, the setting real and in paradise. I had put my makeup on with a paint roller and hadn't sweat it off yet, the breeze hadn't turned me into hurricane hair girl, and the results were surprising...
For more Photo Friday submissions, click here

Way too serious looking, but seriously... the former CEO in me, deep thought from still water, or maybe its because I just bumped my broken toe again, but SOMETHING is bothering me, maybe its the scorpion crawling up my leg.

Again with the goofy look

And now for the real me...

Eyes closed, mouth open
just expressing my opinion about the situation
just lettin you know for real what's goin on
I'm working the sparkle eyeliner and rocking the plastic sequin earrings. Yeee Haaaa!