Photo Friday - Tranquil - Dec 10, 2010

Tranquilo

Behind the Scenery
Just a Little to the Left
Randomness
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Sondra

Sondra created quite the "scenery" as a little crowd drew on the street. She had arrived from Belize City on the Trickster barge, and was carried from the pier to the gallery on a trailer pulled by a golf cart. Important things were happening, such excitement. She was uncrated, de-doored and lifted up the stairs one grueling step at a time. 3 men including a tourist from Denmark, and an hour and a half later she was standing re-doored and all shiny. And I hugged her like she was a tree. I love you Sondra, I said to myself. Its o.k. to love an appliance.

I had remembered everything... that is, except to measure the width on the verandah door. Snap snap went the pinch bar and tap tap from a hammer popped off the moulding, and she slipped right thru. Lovely.

Shirlene poses next to Sondra. "She's pretty noh tru miss Lee, and so BIG."

Where is Old Delia? Old Delia has been relegated to a corner because of her bad ways. Old Delia doesn't like to work, is constantly hot, spoils things and has had many many many many repairmen inside of her. So, unplugged she stands in the corner waiting waiting waiting for the repairman to come to the caye. With Sondra so pretty and cold and big and new, things will never be the same for Old Delia.

Some Fun After a Very Serious Ceremony

Just a Quick Hello from the Peanut Gallery

Caribbean Colors reopens on Caye Caulker

I was two years in Mexico. Two years, wow. Seems like yesterday I closed my store on Caye Caulker and was moving over the border from Belize into Chetumal during the rains of November 2008 which washed away the Northern Highway, like a refugee. Err... I mean, full time artist.

The first few months were exceptionally difficult, not speaking Spanish, and on my own most of the time. Then came the Spanish Teacher with his dry sense of humor chiding me "Miss Lee Ann you are scaring the people again." and "You have to deal with these people and their attitudes with your elbows out, Miss Lee Ann stick your elbows out and establish your space." and my favorite thing he ever said was "Mexicans (read: Catholics) love an apology, so start any sentence with an apology for your bad Spanish." The tutoring always started with a 1/2 hour psychiatric counseling session and ended 2 hours later with my promises to study. I am a terrible student.

Friends were few and far between. In Chetumal there really isn't an expat community, not one that I could find anyhow. Where were all the white people hiding? After two years my neighbors went from fear of the apocolypse to a grudging admiration for the white lady who could now speak her crap Spanish (after the apology) to buy a coke light at the corner store.

I would be exaggerating if I said I did not make ANY friends at all. I was accustomed to meeting new, interesting people every

day on Caye Caulker. After a couple of months I met a couple of cool Belizean ladies living in Chetumal, an American retired real estate agent (soon to move to Corozal) and an American lady living in Corozal who had loads of tips and tricks for traversing the border, essential info for me moving to and fro as I was. And that was it. Four ladies in two years. I found myself going to Chedraui and walking around with my shopping cart looking to bump into English speakers. That worked, but mostly I was beggining to be the weird American lady. As if...

And then came the dengue fever. 14 days sick with it, 10 days on my own, too sick to get out of bed, too sick to go to the doctor, high fever, rash, swelling, constant nose bleed. Trying to stay asleep as much as I could until it passed, IF it would pass. And then not feeling better after it passed, exhaustion, I found out that I had developed a heart problem, an arrhythmia, or irregular heartbeat. The depression that followed, made me realize that I NEVER wanted to be in that predicament again. I began to wonder if I needed to be on an antidepressant. But Ifelt like my depression was the situation, and I was the ony one that could change the situation. Alone in a foreign country, few friends, no one checking on me. Isolation. And while the isolation was good for me to be able to create new things, to have the mental space. I can't handle continual isolation. Who can? Ask someone coming out of solitary confinement.

So, I packed it in, and packed it up. Carload by carload and boatload I moved back to Caye Caulker, and still have some belongings in Mexico strewn across the city with friends. The last time I moved I said "I will never own this much junk again." and here I was, packing up boxes of all my "good stuff." I had decided to reopen my store in the Alamina Beach House apartment, which is located above the Sports Bar (next to the Police Station) It is the same property where my store was before, just in a different location in the building.

I got a lot of encouragement from my artist friends and other gallery owners in Belize to reopen. A good friend in San Pedro talked at length with me and told me some of her back story, which I didn't know. It was a story about having to pull herself up out of the toilet over and over, and reinvent herself, and to isolate the people that are making you crazy.

The biggest gift came early though. I am going to be 50 on November 25 (yes I am a turkey baby) and a friend here on Caye Caulker loaned me her handyman for 2-1/2 days as an early birthday present. So, Lenny painted and hammered and painted and hammered. Thank you Doris. This same friend also came over nearly every day to make sure that I had changed out of my PJs, taken a shower, combed my hair and made progress. She doesn't know that I know what she did, so don't tell her that I know she was checking up on me, but friends like that I am grateful for.

The first couple of weeks back on Caye Caulker, people who had heard of my demise, were surprised and pleased to see me. I simply told them "I am hard to kill." and wiggled my eyebrows, and then did the crazy eyes thing I am so good at.

Two years in Mexico made me realize that I need my people, even if the people on Caye Caulker are nosey and interfering. As I put on my old tear up clothes with 1/2 the fringe missing, nobody looked at me sideways.

So I got Shirlene to come back to work for me again. We are like Thelma & Louise, except we aren't going to commit suicide at the end of the movie.

I have very few regrets in life, and I don't regret closing the old store in 2008 and moving to Chetumal. It was an essential part of the journey.

But it appears that you CAN go home.

If you're confused about where I am, follow the pink.

What's in a Name?

I recently referred to someone as a "douche bag." Not to their face of course, because then I couldn't have the satisfaction of having a passive aggressive rant behind their back. The name fits. This person is irresponsible, a jerk, selfish, and in general a jerk. Whopsydaisy, I used the word jerk twice. Now, I know what a douche bag is in real life. Its a very clever invention for cleaning your tarantula. But the use of it to describe a person and their behavior, where did that come from? Any of you experts on word or phrase origin, feel free to pipe up.
I found this interesting urban dictionary entry: meaning of douche bag

45 Lessons of Life

Written by Regina Brett, 90 years old, of the Plain Dealer, Cleveland, Ohio. To celebrate growing older, she wrote the 45 lessons life 1.
Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16.. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come...
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."

I'll add one more that is mine....
46. Always be prepared. Stop slobbing around in your nightgown. Get up, take your shower, brush your teeth, comb your hair, and put on clean clothes.

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Weather Report

Not exactly the news I wanted to hear this morning...

Photo Friday - Warm

I knew if I looked hard enough, I would catch someone being naughty. And I did. They were a huddle of little ole Muslem ladies over to the side passing a ciggy amongst them. It was WARM that day (more than 90) and the poor ole gals had to stay covered up in their hajib, head covering and long polyester long sleeved gowns. I personally was sweating like a pig in my tank top, cargo shorts and flip flops at the Arab festival in Dearborn. An interesting event to people watch. Every type, shape, size, and ethnicity from men and women in traditional garb, to more modern interpretations of the Koran to out and out carival ho's. (Ya know every carnival hasta have its ho's).

Is it is safe to say that "Only in America" can you see an old Muslem women smoking a ciggy in public?

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Crackberry Jam for Missionary Cougars

I made all my connections like clockwork, which is a rare event. Leaving the house in Chetumal, Mexico at 10:30 p.m. headed for the bus station, I caught a cab right away. Arriving at the terminal not even 15 minutes later, I bought a ticket for the executive class, midnight bus to Cancun. No stops in between, it was a straight shot up the highway to Cancun and I arrived at the downtown bus terminal at 5:20 a.m., just in time to get the 5:30 shuttle to the airport, a 45 minute ride.

So I am at the airport in Cancun, too early to check into my Spirit Airlines cheapo flight to Detroit. I am prepared though with my book and turkey bagel sandwich brought from home and Starbucks is right there beconing me. I have my laptop case and a regular size suitcase, and the place is deserted except for me and the Starbucks lady. I wheel my suitcase over to a nearby table and go to the counter to order a coffee to sip while I eat my bagel brought from home. I don't pay airport prices if I can help it. I would rather bring a sandwich from home than order some expensive piece of nothing.

As I turn and walk back to my table, I see her coming towards me totally dolled up at 6:15 a.m. We are the only two in sight. I don't believe in dolling things up just to get on an airplane with people I will never see again. I am not here to impress anyone, I am just getting from Point A to Point B. I am wearing my Mexican Frida dress and just want to be cool and comfortable in the 103 degree heat. Miss Purple Glitter Eyeshadow with her bling bling shirt and high heels and her enormous suitcase wheel up to the Starbucks counter and order a fancy expensive coffee drink. I am not really paying attention because it is all about the turkey bagel sandwich with dijon mustard now and the John Grisham novel for the next hour. But I do turn my head as she bulldozes her way through the tables and chairs to get to the couches with her coffee and enormous suitcase talking on her blackberry. I watch her as she plops down and starts screaming into the blackberry "WHAT THE FOK! SO YOU ARE FOKING NOT GOING TO FOKING PICK ME UP FROM THE FOKING AIRPORT??!!!! WELL FOK YOU! and then she whips her blackberry, which then becomes a crackberry, across the room and it lands at my feet. What am I supposed to do now, kick it back at her and yell "YOU'RE IT!" I should have just minded my own business because while I was enjoying the SCENERY, the tomato from my turkey bagel sandwich was slowly sliding out the bottom and rolling down the front of my white Frida Dress.

I am trying to clean up the buffet I have created down the front of me and the crackberry phone is still on. I can hear him, the nameless faceless man "Babe... babe... babey... you know I love you... babe... babe... answer me."

The phone went quiet for a few moments and I thought he had hung up and I hear again "Baaaaabbbbbeeeeeeyyyyyy!" loud and clear like its coming from the airport announcement speakers.

Eventually she retreived her phone, not one glance in my direction, nonplussed. I buried myself in my book and didn't even glance up when the newly arrived athlete decided to do olympic stretches at the table next to me. By that time I had pushed my Permanent Ignore button.

Most of the trip was uneventful. I had my aswers practiced and ready in my head
when going thru immigration on entering the U.S. at Detroit Metro. The waitress, oops I mean stewardess passing out the immigration forms made it very clear that if you made a mistake on your form you were NOT going to get a new one. The mistake I made was in the writing of my residence. I do not live in the U.S., and realized this slip up before landing. I physically live in Mexico more than in Belize right now, so I put a slash mark after U.S.A. and wrote Mexico, then realized that I don't have residency in Mexico, I am on a 6 month multiple entry visa, which I had to turn in at the airport since it was going to expire while I was gone. My real residency is Belize, so I put a slash mark after Mexico and wrote Belize.

Trouble brewing, and I felt it. No time to make up a story. The immigration lady officer wasn't too interested, glancing up and down at the salad bar buffet imprinted on my Frida dress. However, the customs agent was absurdely curious. A young guy, tall and probably in his late 20s or early 30s commented on the USA/Mexico/Belize residency and asked me the trick questions.
Customs Officer: "How long have you been out of the country?"
Me: long pause.."Its been 10 months since I left"
Customs Officer: "What were you doing while you were out of the country?"
Me: long pause... "Well, I'm a painter and a photographer."
Customs Officer: "So, what were you doing while you were out of the country?"
Me: "Painting pictures and taking photographs."
Customs Officer: "So did you just go down there and hook up with someone?"
(I am thinking... what does this have to do with smuggling flora and fauna?)
Me: "Well, my husband is Belizean, we have been married for 4 years, so I guess the answer is yes."
Customs Officer: (with a funny look on his face) You can pass...
Me: "Huh?" I am mentally preparing for the "Search"
Customs Officer: Its o.k. you can go
As I am walking away... I start to wonder... was he flirting with me? And I sigh, well that is just magical thinking. I decide that next time I am just going to tell them I am a missionary.

I wheel into the arrivals area and Supergirl is waiting for me with the big ole Lincoln at the curb, and the first words out of her mouth aren't "Hi Mom, nice to see you, been a long time, what presents did you bring for me?" But rather.....
Supergirl: That outfit is screaming "STRIPSEARCH" (as she looks up and down the salad buffet Frida dress)
Me: Must be the crotchless panties.
Supergirl: Gross
Me: You started it...