Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Sometimes a Banana is Just a Banana, Anna

I came across a website that I hadnt looked at in years. I used to go to this site every day to see how I felt. It was a little bit of an obsession. And even though it wasnt 100% correct I found the advice always nurturing and uplifting.

So today, I was reminded of it and I went to look up the free card of the day, and it was a telling one...


The Dream

This has been said again and again, down through the ages. All the religious people have been saying this: "We come alone into this world, we go alone." All togetherness is illusory. The very idea of togetherness arises because we are alone, and the aloneness hurts. We want to drown our aloneness in relationship.... That's why we become so much involved in love. Try to see the point. Ordinarily you think you have fallen in love with a woman or with a man because she is beautiful, he is beautiful. That is not the truth. The truth is just the opposite: you have fallen in love because you cannot be alone. You were going to fall. You were going to avoid yourself somehow or other. And there are people who don't fall in love with women or men--then they fall in love with money. They start moving into money or into a power trip, they become politicians. That too is avoiding your aloneness. If you watch man, if you watch yourself deeply, you will be surprised--all your activities can be reduced to one single source. The source is that you are afraid of your aloneness. Everything else is just an excuse. The real cause is that you find yourself very alone.
Osho Take it Easy, Volume 2 Chapter 1

Commentary:
Some enchanted evening you're going to meet your soulmate, the perfect person who will meet all your needs and fulfill all your dreams. Right? Wrong! This fantasy that songwriters and poets are so fond of perpetuating has its roots in memories of the womb, where we were so secure and "at one" with our mothers; it's no wonder we have hankered to return to that place all our lives. But, to put it quite brutally, it is a childish dream. And it's amazing we hang on to it so stubbornly in the face of reality. Nobody, whether it's your current mate or some dreamed-of partner in the future, has any obligation to deliver your happiness on a platter--nor could they even if they wanted to. Real love comes not from trying to solve our neediness by depending on another, but by developing our own inner richness and maturity. Then we have so much love to give that we naturally draw lovers towards us.
In the past 2 years, sometimes I would wake up in the middle of the night and think, where am I and what am I doing here? But now I am o.k. with being alone, it has taken me time to get to this place, but now that I realize I am here, it is fine.

1 comment:

cindy said...

It's true Lee. It's starting to be easier and easier to be alone. Getting to know ourselves takes a lifetime.